Do You Dare Enter? Part Twenty-Three: April 1972

The DC Mystery Anthologies 1968-1976

by Peter Enfantino
and Jack Seabrook

Nick Cardy

Unexpected 134

"The Restless Dead"
Story by Carl Wessler
Art by Jerry Grandenetti

"Dressed to Kill!"
Story by Carl Wessler
Art by Ernie Chua (Chan)

"The Bravest Man Alive!"
Story Uncredited
Art by Curt Swan and Ray Burnley
(reprinted from House of Mystery #18, September 1953)

"Time Bomb from 1500 A.D."
Story Uncredited
Art by Paul Parker
(reprinted from House of Secrets #58, February 1963)

"If the Spirit is Willing"
Story Uncredited
Art by George Tuska

"Everything You Always Wanted
to Know About Fear*
*But Were Afraid to Ask"
Story by George Kashdan and Murray Boltinoff
Art by John Calnan

Peter: Sandor and Jan make decent money selling the fresh corpses they've unearthed to scientists. Jan has decided grave-robbing is not his favorite vocation and threatens mutiny. In an effort to show him the error of his ways, Sandor finds a new benefactor: Dr. Harvasch, a brilliant but eccentric scientist who has created a race of "non-men," slaves patched together from dead bodies that "live" only to serve the good doctor. Jan doesn't buy the "now we're doing good for mankind" line and tells Sandor he's out of the biz. Sandor plots his partner's death but, in the meantime, has to fill an order for Harvasch. When he shows up at the doc's lab, Harvasch reveals that he is, in reality, one of his own "non-men" and now, so is Jan! Another grand Wessler/Grandenetti mess, "The Restless Dead" further adds to my argument that these writers really didn't know how to write an original story. Here, Wessler obviously pillages Frankenstein and The Body Snatchers with a "twist" that makes no sense (why would the doctor instruct his slaves to reboot him as one of them?). Harvasch, at one point, tells Sandor that the "non-men" have only enough brain matter to obey orders but then explains that they're smart enough to fabricate new members of their clan by themselves. Grandenetti's name is obviously a bad sign but here he looks even more rushed (if that's possible) and cartoony. I'm going to go out on a limb and say this is the worst I've seen Jerry look ever. Have a gander at the panel to the left (yeah, the one that screams "Ngyaaaaa!") and tell me what's going on.

Jack: I had to look at that panel a couple of times when I read the story before I understood that Jan opened the door and was so scared by what he saw that he yelled and dropped his candle. I kind of liked this story. The idea of creating laborers out of dead bodies makes sense, if you ignore ethics, morals, hygiene, and a few thousand years of religion. I thought Jerry's art fit this story pretty well, though that's not saying much.

"If the Spirit is Willing"

Peter: Two quickies this issue. A rich man pops into Ed Mercer's tailoring shop and orders a suit made to order but it must be delivered the following day. Ed spends the entire night fashioning the suit and arrives just in time to see his tailoring put to good use... on the rich man's corpse. "Dressed to Kill" telecasts its punchline in its title but at least it's only four pages long so we don't have to wait too long until it's over. Ernie Chua (later Ernie Chan) provides decent artwork. The other short-short, "If the Spirit is Willing," clocks in at two pages (which is two pages too long) and is unbearably George Tuska. A man races from medium to medium, seeking a contact with the spirit world. When he finally finds an authentic "spiritual advisor," we discover he was actually a ghost trying to get back to the spirit world.

"Dressed to Kill!"

Jack: I got a kick out of "Dressed to Kill!" and did not see the ending coming. What a relief to get a story drawn by Ernie Chua after another Grandenetti special opened the issue! The Tuska story is just short and silly. I feel like we saw this same gimmick awhile back with two parents of a boy who died in a car crash. Didn't they turn out to be ghosts?

Peter: DuBois and Carlton, two daredevil showmen, vie for the title "The Bravest Man Alive!" To determine who will be allowed to keep the title, the duo launch a reign of terror on each other to see who will crack first. The answer is neither and both. "The Bravest Man Alive!" is another in a series of hugely entertaining "check your brain at the door" stories that populated the DC anthologies in the 1950s, one that reflects the influence the EC line had on all horror comics. The oneupsmanship between the two death-defiers would have been very comfortable between the covers of The Haunt of Fear (albeit with a heaping of gore) and only its goofy final panel (wherein Cranston dies of a heart attack after finding out DuBois has outwitted him and nabbed the title) made me roll my eyes.  Because I'm finding so much pleasure in reading these vintage nuggets, I'm wondering if Jack and I didn't begin our journey in the wrong decade.

"The Bravest Man Alive!"

More proof of that can be found in "Time Bomb From 1500 A.D." Cryptogram whiz Hal deciphers a puzzling message from Leonardo Da Vinci, mapping out his invention of a mysterious device he locked in a time capsule and dumped off the coast near Rome. Wasting no time, Hal and his pal, Dan Summers go diving and, sure enough, they find the capsule. While hauling it aboard their ship, the package splits and a statue is revealed. Investigating further, the pair discover the statue is filled with explosives and that they've been followed by notorious gangster "Sport" Lascar, who wants to use the sculpture to blow up a train carrying gold bullion. Only fast thinking on Hal's part puts the kibosh on Lascar's evil plan. Yep, there's some really silly stuff going on here but that might just add to its appeal. Why would Lascar go to all the trouble of tracking the pair instead of just using dynamite and how did he find out about the sculpture in the first place? Why did it take four centuries for someone to decipher the cryptogram and isn't it amazing that the time capsule wasn't at least buried under a layer of silt? The most important question, I guess, is why does Peter Enfantino excuse silliness from these nutty old yarns and not from the new material being presented? Could it be that the vibe that emanates from the reprints is one of enthusiasm rather than disregard?

"Time Bomb From 1500 A.D."

Jack: I enjoyed "The Bravest Man Alive!" even though some of the stunts the two men pull to torture each other presuppose a level of skill that might even tax James Bond. The Curt Swan/Ray Burnley artwork is very smooth and pure 1953-era DC. "Time Bomb from 1500 A.D." is a perfect example of a story that fits the comic's title of Unexpected without having anything to do with horror. I had never heard of Paul Parker before but I like his art. He had an odd career, according to the Grand Comics Database, and his last credit was in 1965 for a romance mag. I have to mention that a story from 1963 with a helicopter and a statue that is set in Rome makes me want to watch La Dolce Vita yet again!

"Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Bad Writing*...
But Only Had to Read Unexpected to Find Out."

Peter: The worst is saved for last this issue with the oh-so-cutely titled "Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Fear*... * But Were Afraid to Ask." The wealthy Mr. Gault hires Chivvers to be his new butler and finds the man brings with him many dangers. When Chivvers asks his master if the rest of his family can come to stay, the fun really begins. Another incredibly dumb story that makes no sense whatsoever, wrapped up with a climax that will have you questioning if the title "editor" actually meant anything in 1972. Thanks to the time we invested discussing Batman in the 1970s, we know that John Calnan's art is only going to get worse so, I suppose, let's be thankful that it's at least serviceable here.

Jack: Serviceable? Serviceable? This is almost worse than Grandenetti! Naming the butler "Chivvers" (shivers--get it?) should have tipped us off right away. Apparently, Murray Boltinoff came up with the plot, such as it is, and George Kashdan actually wrote this, which means that it took two writers to put this tripe together! Oh, the humanity. The story's title is a take-off on a 1972 Woody Allen movie, which was an "adaptation" of a 1969 sex manual. Listen, the 1970s weren't all roses.

Peter: On the Unexpected Mail page, Cheryl Janeway asks: "After Boris Karloff and Lon Chaney, Jr., who was the actor that was regarded as king of the mummies?" Answer is: Tom Tyler. I'm impressed with the knowledge of our Uncredited Letter Answerer, but I'd argue that Christopher Lee made a more imposing bandaged beastie in Hammer's The Mummy (1959) than Tyler (in The Mummy's Hand, 1940). Of course, I wouldn't even put the podgy Chaney in the conversation anyway, but that's just me.

Jack: I just watched Chaney in Of Mice and Men. He gave a powerful performance. It's funny that the voice in my head ("Which way did he go, George?") from all those Bugs Bunny cartoons I watched as a kid was actually a takeoff on this very serious and tragic character.

Michael W. Kaluta

The House of Mystery 201

"Put Your Trust in a Killer!"
Story by Steve Skeates
Art by Adolfo Buylla

"Million-Dollar Magic"
Story Uncredited
Art by Bernard Bailey
(reprinted from House of Mystery #60, March 1957)

"Hail the Conquering Aliens"
Story Uncredited
Art by Ruben Moreira
(reprinted from House of Mystery #103, October 1960)

"The Demon Within!"
Story by Joe Orlando and John Albano
Art by Jim Aparo

"A Tale of Vengeance!"
Story by John Albano
Art by Sam Glanzman

"Put Your Trust in a Killer!"

Peter: George Ringler will be going to the electric chair for murder unless his boss, Big Joe, can get him off. Problem is, Big Joe wants George to fry so that the truth, that Big Joe himself is actually the culprit, won't come to light. Ringler's not the brightest bulb in the chandelier so he keeps assuring his wife that she can "Put Your Trust in a Killer!" One night, Cain the caretaker comes to George's room and shows him what would have been had his fingerprints not been found at the crime scene. Ringler sees that Joe would have knocked him off to keep him quiet. Suddenly, George Ringler wants to confess. Not a very gripping or exciting narrative, this one, but Steve Skeates will get better eventually. It is interesting to see Cain play an active role in the story rather than just commenting at the bookends. Yes, we've seen him make two- or three-panel cameos before, but never actually putting the plot through its motions as he does here. This is Adolfo Buylla's first contribution to the mystery line (he'd only appear twice afterwards). I was struck by how much Buylla's work reminded me of the Gold Key titles and their fondness for the Spanish artists. Ironically, Adolfo would soon jump ship and draw for Gold Key's Grimm's Ghost Stories, a title that would be most apropos for "Put Your Trust in a Killer!"

Jack: I really liked this story! The plot held my interest and the art was above average. I don't recall seeing that Cain had magic powers before. Here, he does a Cher and turns back time. By the way, you did not mention the cover by Kaluta and the beautiful single-page intro by Bernie Wrightson, featuring Cain and the Frankenstein monster. Cover, Cain intro, first story drawn by Buylla--a fine start to this issue!

Peter: On the reprint front this time out: Old-timer Caspar Creed spends millions on worthless trinkets, hoping to find the "Million-Dollar Magic" that will regain him his youth. Though Caspar travels the world over, he finally stumbles on the fountain of youth right in his own backyard... and then drinks a little too deeply. The plot's been done to death but "Million-Dollar Magic" is not too bad and its ironic finale actually brought a twinkle to my horror-jaded eyes. What doesn't float my artistic boat are Bernard Bailey's etchings, which lack anything remotely exciting. Smack dab in the middle of a mock alien invasion, we're invaded by aliens! Sounds like a great scenario, you say. Sure does, but the idea for "Hail the Conquering Aliens" is better than the execution. It's a confusing and, ultimately, really silly fluff piece with the typically adequate art of Ruben Moreira, a prolific DC mystery artist and co-creator of the popular Rip Hunter series. The outlandish plot, where a group of soldiers dress up like aliens and hold a town prisoner, could be read as an analogy for the Red Scare of the 1950s, I guess, but that might be giving (uncredited) too much... credit.

"Million-Dollar Magic"

Jack: Peter, are you kidding? Baily's work on "Million-Dollar Magic" is great! As I read it, I was thinking how Baily is becoming one of my favorite artists of the '40s and '50s. I have enjoyed his work on The Spectre in the Golden Age All-Star Comics. I guess it's all a matter of taste! I also realized (once again) as I read this story one of the big differences between old comics and new ones that makes me prefer the old ones--they have a lot more dialog and captions! Comics today seem to be all pictures and few words. "Hail the Conquering Aliens" has plenty of twists and turns, with the story changing directions every few panels. It was better than I expected it to be, though. I guess even adequate DC art in 1960 was better than some of the art we got in the new stories in 1972.

"Hail the Conquering Aliens"

Peter: Little Gary Winters' ability to transform himself into a monster has become a complete embarrassment to his middle-class parents and stuck-up big sister. In an effort to regain their social status, the Winters turn to specialists to tame "The Demon Within" their son and fully accept the consequences. Oh, I get it! Those who are different in our milquetoast and Christian society shall be castigated and castrated before the evil can grow and infect. Yeah, I read One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest and so did Albano and Orlando, it seems. Pretension masquerading as art. I like Jim Aparo but has there ever been an Aparo style or has there only ever been Adams-Lite?

"The Demon Within!"

Jack: What a disturbing story! You're right that Aparo is very Adams-like here, though I think it's safe to say that Jim Aparo has a style of his own. You must admit that you don't mistake his work for that of anyone else, and when you read a story that's drawn by Aparo you know it's him right away. I think you must have been in a bad mood when you read this issue, because it's not as bad as you're making it out to be!

Peter: Chet Yovac blames mine owner Whitney Claymore for the death of Chet's father. After burning the Claymore residence to the ground, Chet is institutionalized for years but, once sprung, he kidnaps Claymore's daughter and holds her in one of the old man's mines. Claymore concocts a fool-proof plan: he instructs his assistant to dress as Chet's dead father and talk the boy out of the mine. Once the spectre of Chet's pop shows up, the plan goes pretty well until the mine begins to collapse. All escape but Chet. As Claymore and his daughter flee the mine, they are approached by the assistant who couldn't get to the mine in time for the plan. How many times have we seen that ending? I had to laugh when Chet robs and murders a man at a poker game so that he can afford to buy a police uniform, all the better to kidnap Claymore's daughter. He's a nut with a gun; he doesn't need a uniform. This is truly dreadful stuff, with the cherry on top of the moldy sponge cake being Sam Glanzman's other-worldly pencils (everyone in this strip has a huge nose!). An early favorite for worst art of the year and most yawn-inducing issue of House of Mystery in many a moon.

"A Tale of Vengeance"

Jack: I'm with you on this story but not on the issue as a whole, which I enjoyed. Glanzman's art here looks like it belongs in a 1972-era underground comic, not in a DC comic. It would fit right in alongside Crumb and Shelton. I looked up Glanzman, something I think I've done before, and was interested to see that he has had a career in comics that began in 1939 and went at least into the 2000s. Pretty impressive! Presumably, this story was not his best work.

Nick Cardy

Ghosts 4

"The Crimson Claw!"
Story by Leo Dorfman
Art by George Tuska

"The Ghostly Cities of Gold!"
Story by Leo Dorfman
Art by Jerry Grandenetti

"The Man Who Killed His Shadow"
Story Uncredited
Art by Curt Swan and Ray Burnley
(reprinted from House of Mystery #16, July 1953)

"The Fanged Spectres of Kinshoro"
Story by Leo Dorfman
Art by Ernie Chua

"The Legend of the Black Swan"
Story Uncredited
Art by Ramona Fradon
(reprinted from House of Mystery #48, March 1956)

"The Threshold of Nightmare House"
Story by Leo Dorfman
Art by John Calnan

"The Crimson Claw!"

Jack: Maryland, 1839: Little Johnny's mother thinks she must have imagined it when she saw the baby's hand turn into "The Crimson Claw!" She has a similar vision one Halloween years later. Johnny grows up and has the same vision while having his fortune told by a gypsy. Little did he or his mother know he would grow up to become the notorious assassin, John Wilkes Booth! This is about as dopey as a story can get. Leading off an issue with a 4-pager by Tuska does not bode well.

Peter: For its first 71 issues, Ghosts will carry the subtitle "True Tales of the Weird and Supernatural" (shortly thereafter DC would modify the line to "New Tales of..."). I'm not sure if that means we'll be subjected to the same kind of poppycock as "The Crimson Claw!" for the rest of our journey or at some point saner heads will prevail and we'll get some honest to gosh good storytelling. Since Murray Boltinoff will edit the title for the entire duration of our study, I'm not holding my breath. Now's a good time to recommend a massive article devoted to Ghosts, written by John Wells, that appeared in Back Issue #52. You'll learn much more about the saga of Leo Dorfman and Murray Boltinoff than Jack and I could ever tell you. Pick up a copy at Twomorrows.com. In that piece, it's explained that Ghosts had no letters page because Boltinoff couldn't string together enough LOCs to justify a full page.

"Good" Grandenetti (?)

Jack: On the Yucatan Peninsula, old Esteban uses a magic parchment to retrieve gold from the lost city of Cibola in order to help two Americans who are building homes for his poor people. Greedy Pablo and Miguel force Estaban to give them the parchment but they ignore his warning that their greed will prevent them from bringing back any profit from "The Ghostly Cities of Gold!" They disappear, but are those their skeletons that are found in the ruins months later, with golden manacles on their wrists? Only slightly better than the opening story, this mess proves that Jerry Grandenetti will not give Carl Barks any competition in illustrating stories about Cibola.

Peter: In the same week that I damn Jerry Grandenetti's work over in Unexpected, I have to lightly praise it here on "The Ghostly Cities of Gold," a fairly atmospheric tale with a nice kick in the rear. Jerry's heavily inked here so most of his trademark squiggly-wiggly is hidden and I suspect that's what leads to my favorable reaction. At any rate, this is about the best we've gotten from new material in this title.

"The Fanged Spectres of Kinshoro"

Jack: It's 1934 in Tanganyika, and Dr. Harrison's medical station is being turned upside down by "The Fanged Spectres of Kinshoro," a pride of ghostly lions set loose by a witch doctor. Only by enlisting the aid of a wise old tribesman can Dr. Harrison stop the carnage and set the lions back on the man who sent them. This may not be much of a story, but at least Ernie Chua can draw!

Peter: I can see very clearly from the little number on the bottom of the last page that "The Fanged Spectres" runs seven pages, so why did it seem like ten times that amount?

Guest-starring Paul Lynde

Jack: Debra Wayne has a recurring nightmare of going to a scary house and meeting a ghost of herself. Her shrink prescribes a rest cure at the beach, so her boyfriend rents her a house at Cape Cod. Too bad the house looks just like the one from her nightmares! When she crosses "The Threshold of Nightmare House," her boyfriend leaves her alone and the realtor tells her it's haunted. Sure enough, things go bump in the night, and next evening they find poor Debra dead of a heart attack. Only her little puddy-tat can see the real cause--her ghostly doppleganger! Boy, this has to be the worst issue of Ghosts yet, and we're only on number four. There is just about nothing to recommend in this putrid volume!

Peter: So, you're scared to death of a house in your nightmares that looks just like the one you're going to vacation in. Whattya do? Well, if you're Debra, you ignore the realtor, who tells you of the past renters who claim the place is haunted, and tell your badly-drawn husband you're staying for a month, right? I'm not sure if our resident Ghost-ologist Leo Dorfman is trying to tell us, in the end, that Debra had a poltergeist or Debra was the poltergeist! A really bad gothic ghost story.

"The Legend of the Black Swan"

Jack: Jockey Flash Nesbitt becomes "The Man Who Killed His Shadow" when he murders private eye Jeff Maxon, but soon he is haunted by shadows that seem to reenact the murder everywhere he goes. He sees one too many shadows and crashes his car into a tree, causing his own death. The police reveal that a man with a projector had been following him around and that the shadows were a plot to get him to confess. The cops sure had some advanced technology in those days! A cocky college student does not believe "The Legend of the Black Swan" and bets that he can spend a night on a haunted ship. He barely escapes with his life! Gosh, I was so surprised to learn that the ghosts were real and that the actors hired to scare the poor sap were late in arriving. Never heard THAT one before.

Peter: ... and the award for longest expository ever in a comic book (reproduced below) goes to "The Man Who Killed His Shadow," a truly loony and utterly boring "Is it Supernatural or Not?" tale with art by Curt Swan that makes the strip look as though it was produced in the 1940s. A rare misfire in the reprint department. Not much better is "The Legend of the Black Swan," which begs the question... "how many of these 1950s ghost stories ended with the same punchline: "Oh, so sorry, sir. The car broke down and I wasn't able to make it out to put a scare in your friend!"

"No, Phil, the giant rear projection screen we built over the underpass
only caused 14 accidents and three fatalities. It was the only way we
could catch the perp..."

More indescribable madness from
the pencil of Jerry Grandenetti